Why have Children if your going to hurt them?

by Turgytosser on February 9, 2014 - 5:59pm

In the article “Father given unsupervised access to children he molested” published by CBC News on November 28th, 2013 explains that the safety and well-being of children is not always secure even though we might think it is. Many children are abused by the people who should of have given them love and safety, but instead result in pain. 


In a custody case, a B.C. Supreme Court judge found the father committing the abuse but criminal charges were never to be made. The mother is suing the province, claiming it allowed more abuse to take place. 4 young children, 2 boys and 2 girls, at least 3 of them admitted to their mother of being sexually abused by their own father. The B.C. Supreme Court in Vancouver ordered the father that he could only have supervised access to his children. The Ministry decided that the mother was crazy making the children admit that they were molested so she could gain full custody of her children. The more the mother cried for help, the more she was told to be crazy. The children were then put in foster care allowing the father unsupervised access. This just resulted the continuation of the abuse. When Vancouver Police interviewed the father, they bought his story just like the Ministry did by telling them false statements. It seemed as if it was more a of a social interaction than an interview. The children were found to be sexually abused by their father and the judge gave the mother full custody and a restraining order to the father closing the case. 


The mother in this article was just defending her own children, yet she gets told that she is over exaggerating. Why would she even make this up in the first place? I don’t even know how the Vancouver Police Department and the Ministry believed the father. The mother is being honest and she is the one getting all the blame. The father is not being loyal yet he is getting less accused for something he did do. This is about noticing what is right and what is wrong. Clearly, the mother should be in favor. 


Most of us can’t even imagine what would make an adult use violence towards an innocent child or even how it would feel to be the victim. You shouldn’t harm someone especially if they can’t even defend themselves. No matter what he or she has done, they do not deserve to be abused. There is a difference between punishment and abuse; spanking, time-out chair or go sit in the corner is pure discipline but abusing them is a different story. I was always told my parents, don’t do things to others that you wouldn’t want to be done to you. Children deserve to live their own childhoods just like you and I did. They’re just innocent children. So why have children if your going to hurt them?


“Father given unsupervised access to children he molested.” Cbc.ca. N.p., 28 Nov. 2013. Web. 4 Feb. 2014. 




I agree with your position on the issue although I do not believe the judge and ministry are to blame. Cases like these are very difficult to evaluate. Children are extremely influenceable and sadly don't make very credible witnesses in court. Yes, the fact that the accused father got to keep seeing his children was probably a bad decision. It is extremely sad to know that these children and their mother were treated this way and of course it is absolutely wrong to take advantage of beings who cannot defend themselves. Even if they could defend themselves, abuse of any kind is wrong. The judge was also wrong in making a decision like that without getting more information on the case and should have probably put the children in the custody of a relative such as a grandparent for the duration of the trial. The mother should have clearly been evaluated by a psychologist before making conclusions about her situation. The issue is obviously the fact that the children were molested but what does this say about the justice system? How can justice be served when we leave room for unruly judgement and blame?

I find this topic very interesting and the title picked my curiosity, bad parenting is always a difficult topic to judge and to conclude from outside as a caring society, but apparently hard for judges too. It's sad that these kids had to endure more abuse from their father than necessary for them get help. It's absolutely wrong to physically abuse any kid in any circumstances and this can leave emotional and psychological scars with them for the rest of their lives. I think the judge was wrong to label her as crazy and dismiss her, she was just a caring mother trying desperately to saves her children away from the father. Should judges give more time and attention to cases where children are involved?

To start, I find your article to be very interesting, and the title was an eye grabber because you hear of domestic violence on the news, where the mother gets full access to the children after one child abuse action from the father but in this case its different. I think there lacks info on if there was any evidence, for example, bruising which could have won the case in the beginning. But without this evidence it could be hard for the judge to decide on the verdict. But to treat the mother with disrespect by deeming her crazy, and it will not provide effective justice in the end, it will continue to harm the person that is being abused. I believe that harming a child is wrong, where hitting, and sexual abuse is involved excluding disciplinary spankings in which parent, does not use emotions in it. Thus, in this case, the father should have never had unsupervised time with the kids. But on the otherhand how could we know fully if the father is abusing the children if theres no evidence. One can ask, what actions or laws, can be put in place to prevent such ineffective justice?

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