No More Guilt

by jasmined on March 18, 2013 - 9:55am

Because I am an athlete who is very active and constantly concerned about the shape of my body, my idea is a pill that eliminates all amount of bad calories. To be more specific, one pill would eliminate all substances of fat, carbohydrates, cholesterol, sodium and sugar. My goal is to help those who, like myself have huge cravings of non-healthy food. It is only useful if you take it after you have eaten because it reacts immediately on what you eat before your body starts digesting it.

However, there are many advantages in taking this pill: there are no adverse or  ill side effects, there is no age limit and it will help the majority of people who have a hard time depriving themselves. It is entirely made with natural ingredients, it is biodegradable and it is healthy in every way. In fact, I strongly recommend not to take more than one per day. The disadvantage of taking this pill to often is your system would get used to the effect and eventually lose its result. Therefore; my product is made for abolishing all nutriments that you have stuffed yourself with. This way, it keeps you from quickly gaining weight and from feeling guilty.

Having a fit body and trying to maintain good habits of eating healthy are two things which are very hard to manage. That is why I consider my product ethical. It responds to many people's weight and food obsession problems, it does not pollute our environment, the price is affordable and 2% of the profit goes to foundations who donate money or supply food to other countries that are in need.

Comments

 

Virtual Writing Tutor helped me correct a few errors that I did not necessarily see while revising my text. I wrote ". It is only useful if you take it after you have ate because it reacts immediately on what you eat before your body starts digesting it." They mention that I have two sentences joined with a coordinating conjunction (because) but without a comma before. I did not add the comma because I do not think it needs one but I mentioned it to see your point of view (Norm). In the same sentence, I forgot to put the verb eat in the past participle as of "eaten".

Also, I wrote a sentence enumerating all the advantages of my product but Virtual Writing Tutor made me realise that there were to many commas for that one sentence. So, I broke this sentence in two. I wrote "affect" instead of "effect" where these two words do not have the same meaning. "Affect" would mean to act upon or influence, to move or disturb emotionally or mentally. However "effect" means the power or ability to influence or produce a result; efficacy and that is the proper sense I was looking for. Finally, I wrote " It responds to many people's weight and food obsession problems". "To" is a proposition and "too" is an adverb meaning 'excessively'. So, I had to write the adverb form.