You Won't Get Noticed Anyways

by JustSomeGirl on September 16, 2014 - 10:50pm


“Oh sweetie, you aren’t a size 5? We don’t carry this dress in anything smaller than a size 5, sorry.” And all the size 0 employees giggle as her size 14 figure walks out because she just doesn’t fit in. Literally.  Somehow we, as a society, thinks this is ok, we seem to think that judging a woman based on her size, on how she looks, is acceptable because, face it, who cares if she’s extremely smart and has a heart the size of Texas? We’ll probably just say that even if she has a heart of the size of Texas, no one’s going to ever notice because men don’t go for “bigger” women. God forbid. Ever look at a magazine ad and see a woman who’s what seems to be average weight, size 8-12, average height, B-cup breast size, curly hair that isn’t blond? Keep dreaming, that will never happen. Women who will be shown to the public, in ads, as models, as actresses, have to loom a certain way, they have to look what the media has told us is beautiful. Skinny, large breasts, big eyes, long hair, thin face, muscular toned arms, but not too muscular, she isn’t a man and a flat tummy when she sits. No one questions it, we all just nod our head in agreement as we chew our carrots, struggling to look that way. Oh she has to have a nice butt, otherwise men might not even look her way twice, because men are the first ones turning a girl down because she was too fat or didn’t have a pretty enough face for them. Oh I failed to mention that half of these men are walking around with beer bellies and balding heads, but who says anything about them? It’s ok for them to look that way, because even if a woman wants a muscular, thin, tall, blue eyes, dirty blond hair, has scruff and smells fantastic, we’ll settle for the chubbier short cute guy, whereas men won’t settle, because they think they can do better.

As little girls we see this happening, in high school our beautiful thin friend got all the guys and we were lucky if one even said hi to us. And no one realizes how this affects us women from such a young age, thinking we will never be good enough, we have to starve ourselves and cake on makeup and wear 5” heels and skirts that we need to pull down every two seconds because face it, it’s too short. Women will always, and not just in the media, be judged to look thinner and dress sexier and have men chasing after her from as young as 15. We accept this but know it’s wrong, it’s been this way for so long, and who will say something to change it? No one.


I feel like you have read my mind! What you have written is exactly on point with everything I have noticed in the media, and how the media talks about the appearance of (mainly) women. I remember when I was younger, my older sister used to spend an insane amount of time getting ready, and trying to look 'perfect' to only step out of the house to make a quick five-minute run to the corner store. Eventually I did try to buy into what magazines were saying and tried to look skinny and beautiful by taking an extended period of time to look good, but gladly I quickly got tired of doing so. Now, when it comes to appearance, I do things for myself and whatever is comfortable to me. And by doing that, I am confident.
Your writing is very poignant, too the point (no beat around the bush), and very well thought out. Very good observations about what is occurring in the media (magazines, advertisements, etc.). It is good that you have pointed out that a lot of the criticism comes from those who do not 'take care' of themselves (i.e.: balding men with large stomachs), but it may also good to note that men experience similar scrutiny as women. I'd like to state that it is not the same experiences but similar. It has been a rising topic nowadays that men are also subject to looking like the 'perfect' man. Men who are posing in magazines are typically tall, have extremely muscular frames (ones in which are hard to achieve for the average male) and have chiseled features in their facial features and other such body parts. The average male might feel pressured to undergo hours of exercising to achieve such muscular features, and some might even undergo the extent of surgery to achieve a muscular frame or have good facial features. Women have the advantage of using make up to hide their embarrassing facial features (such as acne) but men typically do not use make up, therefore resorting to more permanent procedures.

I chose to comment on this post because I find it interesting to see that the way women are judged by their appearance, more specifically their size, is very similar to the way that people of a visible minority are judged by their skin tone. Also a lot like women, people of a visible minority tend to get overlooked because of their appearance. In a way, women can be considered a visible minority when it comes to gender inequality, because they are treated similarly to people of visible minorities when it comes to things like job opportunities.

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